By Jordan Beach, Courier & Press, Feb. 27, 2018 –

Where is the balance for busy moms?  You know what I mean, moms. We’re always chasing the perfect mix of family life, work life and “me” time.

There are so many expectations.  We tell ourselves our children should be in a million activities (that we should always attend), the house should be spotless, we should exercise daily and there should be some type of made-from-scratch organic meal on the table every night (where the entire family sits down together and eats in peace).

Let’s get real for a minute… This is no parent’s reality.  The truth is that parents feel stretched in a thousand different directions.

So where is that perfect balance, the happy place where you feel like you’re giving enough to your family but also practicing self-care?

Is it okay for a mother to leave the house and do something alone or with a friend, and if it is, why do we feel like we’re neglecting our children while we’re gone?

The truth is, there is no magic equation for time spent with family vs. time spent away to equal a happy mom; it looks different for everyone.  It is, however, important to take time to care for yourself.

So how do you make time for yourself? I’ve listed some suggestions below.

• Make a date with yourself. Seriously, schedule a time to sit down and decide what you can do for you and realistically not feel overwhelmed by missing things going on at home.  This looks different for everyone, and that is okay.
• Make a list of things you want to try or make time for again. Maybe you were formerly an avid reader but now fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow and have forgotten what it feels like to be lost in a good book.  Pick those books back up.
• Contact long-lost friends and get together (they probably need “friend time” too).
• Let your village help you. The weight of the world does not have to be solely on your shoulders.
• Decide how often you need this time and schedule it.

The more love you show yourself, the easier it will become to take the time for self-care.  Taking time to reset and recharge will supply the energy and patience you’ve been looking for.

Life is not a Pinterest board. Things get messy and busy, and in all of the chaos it is important to remember that you’re a good mom.  Allowing yourself to reset helps you handle the messes more seamlessly.