Kids Need Boundaries

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By Audrey Angermeier, MSW, LSW – September 24, 2025 –

As any parent or guardian knows, setting boundaries with children can be challenging, especially when it comes to following through. Let’s face it, it would be so much easier to give your child what they want or let them do whatever they please all the time. There would probably be fewer arguments, less eyerolling, and fewer tantrums or meltdowns, which always seem to happen at the worst possible times.

If kids are getting what they want, there shouldn’t be any pushback from them, right? Wrong! Children crave and thrive on consistency. The ironic part is that most of them don’t even know it. However, the facts clearly show that if we are not consistent in setting boundaries with children at an early age, they are more likely to struggle with self-discipline, behavior management, and healthy social interactions with peers. The likelihood of the child becoming manipulative also increases. 

Setting boundaries and sticking to them is very important for your child’s development. According to Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore, implementing age-appropriate boundaries at different developmental stages in a child’s life while maintaining a safe environment will help them develop their independence. While setting boundaries for children, it is important to remember the four C’s recommended by psychotherapist Elizabeth Beiderman ­— Communication, Clarity, Conviction, and Consistency.

Communication may seem obvious, but while relaying the set boundaries to the child, everyone involved in the child’s life must be notified of those boundaries as well.

This ties in with the fourth C, Consistency. Having consistency in every environment the child may be in will help them understand expectations and respect for others.

Clarity is crucial when explaining a child’s boundaries to them. Speaking clearly, breaking down why the child has this boundary (and what the consequences are if they break this boundary) will help them understand their set expectations.

That brings us to the remaining C, Conviction. It’s important to be kind and compassionate when setting boundaries, but it’s also essential to be firm and confident. Showing a child that you mean what you say, sticking to the boundaries you implemented, and following through on the consequences if the boundary is broken are the keys to long-lasting, effective boundaries.

Parents who do not set clear boundaries with their young children may experience parental burnout, anxiety, depression, and personal relationship problems. It’s no secret that when we feel tired or burnt out, it is harder to carry out activities in our everyday lives.

Taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally, and physically is one of the most important things you can do to help your child. You are modeling healthy behaviors and helping your child understand the importance of taking care of the whole body. When taking care of yourself, you are also more likely to react with thought and purpose when dealing with negative or positive behaviors. This means fewer arguments, eyerolling, tantrums, and meltdowns. Isn’t that the kind of family harmony we are all striving for?

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Gaining Mental Clarity Through a Digital Detox

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By Abby Betz, MSW, LCSW – September 18, 2025 –

We live in a world where our screens never sleep. It is not very often that our minds truly get a break from the onslaught of social media and all of the information available on the World Wide Web.

From never-ending notifications to late-night scrolling, the constant digital overload is silently altering our mood and draining our focus and peace of mind. It is essential to examine the benefits of a digital detox, which can not only restore our mental clarity but also bring balance to our lives.

It is virtually impossible to escape screens in today’s overly connected world. With the popularity of phones, smartwatches, TVs, tablets, and other devices, we are constantly “plugged in” to some form of technology. Although there are many benefits of modern technology, including staying informed and connected with others, the downside of technology often leaves us feeling overstimulated and burnt out.

Too much screen time is also associated with health risks such as increased anxiety and sleep disturbances. Moreover, a study by the American Psychological Association reported that people who check their devices more than 80 times a day indicate higher rates of overall stress in their lives.

The thought of taking a break from screens may seem daunting, but there are signs to watch for that may indicate a digital detox is needed. If you find yourself scrolling through your phone first thing in the morning and last thing at night, it may be time to take a break. Constantly switching between apps or multitasking on screens may leave you feeling overwhelmed and sometimes confused.

If you feel mentally foggy, anxious, or irritable after long scrolling sessions or feel like you can’t stop checking when you try to unplug, it may be time to put the phone down. Additionally, if you have noticed a decline in the quality or duration of your sleep, you may be putting your health at risk.

Taking a complete break from screens may not seem feasible, but you don’t have to completely disappear from the tech world to reset. There are small changes or habits you can incorporate into your daily life to help create balance. A simple change may include starting your mornings without screens. Instead, use this time to stretch, walk, journal, or meditate. Establish “tech-free” zones, such as the bedroom or dinner table and ask your family to participate. Limit app notifications and set boundaries on how much information you receive. Even small breaks from the digital world have been proven to reduce cortisol levels, improve attention span, and promote feelings of inner peace.

If making small changes on your own does not seem to be working, a therapist or mental health professional can also help you understand your relationship with technology. Therapy can address feelings of dependency and screen addiction. Working with a therapist to create a personalized treatment plan can help address your struggles with screen time. The goal of therapy is to regain control of and successfully regulate your emotions. With any change in habits or behavior, starting small and setting manageable goals for yourself is key.

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Coping with Childhood Anxiety

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By Lori Powell, MSW, LCSW – September 10, 2025 –

In today’s world, we hear a lot about anxiety. The American Psychological Association defines anxiety as “an emotion characterized by apprehension and somatic symptoms of tension in which an individual anticipates impending danger, catastrophe, or misfortune.” 

Everyone experiences anxiety to some degree, but not everyone experiences an anxiety disorder. Anxiety disorders include excessive worry, fear, and avoidance that may significantly interfere with daily life.

What does anxiety look like in children? Children may seem more irritated, uneasy, or have physical problems such as headaches or stomach aches when they are experiencing anxiety.  

Anxiety looks different for everyone. For example, when riding with a parent to school, a child with anxiety might refuse to leave the vehicle when arriving or begin hitting the parent because their fear is so extreme.  

Another student might visit the school nurse regularly, complaining of headaches or stomach problems. If the school nurse reports that there is no evidence of sickness, the student could be experiencing anxiety, especially if this situation is happening more frequently.  

Here are five helpful, positive coping skills that parents can use to help their children reduce the intensity of anxiety: deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, positive self-talk, and visualizing safe places or an animal they like.    

  1. Deep breathing is a great technique to help regulate emotions and the body. An example of a deep breathing technique is taking a deep breath through your nose, like you are smelling your favorite scent (chocolate cake or a rose), breathing out through your mouth (as if blowing out birthday candles). Just make sure that breathing is slow and deep. 
  1. Progressive muscle relaxation is another technique that can be used to help reduce anxiety. Starting with their toes, have your child tense and relax each muscle group all the way up through their head. When finished, ask your child to identify the emotion they’re feeling and recognize how their body feels. 
  1. Using the five senses can also help children reduce anxiety. An example of a technique that can be used is identifying five things you can see, touch, hear, smell, and taste.    
  1. It’s important to encourage children to talk positively about themselves. When they say things like, “I can’t do anything right” or “I’m always messing things up,” it can negatively affect their mental health. Ask them to use positive affirmations such as “I can do hard things” or “I can get through this situation.” Thinking and speaking positively helps everyone have a better attitude.
  1. Another method children can try is to think about something that makes them feel safe. For example, they can think about their pet or an animal they like, (What does the animal look like, feel like, sound like, and smell like?) or a place that makes them feel safe (What does the place look like, what does it smell like, what can you touch, and what do you hear when you are in this place?). Details are important with this activity. 

The CDC reports that 11 percent of children ages 3 to 17 had been diagnosed with anxiety, according to 2022-2023 data in the United States. If a child’s anxiety becomes more severe and episodes become more frequent, parents should contact the child’s pediatrician for an appointment or have their child evaluated by a therapist. 

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The Homework Struggle: How Parents and Kids Can Cope Without Conflict

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by Britney Wagler, MSW, LCSW – September 3, 2025 –

As the school year settles into full swing, many households find themselves battling a familiar evening routine: the “homework struggle.” It’s a time that often brings stress, frustration, and even tears for both parent and child. With the right coping strategies, however, parents and kids can transform homework time into a more positive and productive experience.

Homework frustration stems from a mix of factors. For students, it can be a lack of understanding, fatigue after a long school day, or feeling overwhelmed by excessive work. For parents, watching their child struggle, especially when they want to help but don’t know how, can quickly lead to tension.

Every parent wants their child to succeed. When a student isn’t doing well, this can lead to frustration. It’s important to remember that frustration is a normal emotion, but how we respond to it makes all the difference to our children.

What can a parent do to minimize the frustration, stress and tears of homework?

  1. Take a step back. Resist the urge to correct or fix mistakes immediately. Let your child attempt the work on their own first. This builds independence and confidence.
  2. Stay calm and supportive. Your tone sets the mood. If your child senses your frustration, they may shut down or mirror that emotion. Take deep breaths, stay positive, and remind them and yourself that learning takes time.
  3. Break it down. Help your child break assignments into smaller, manageable tasks. This can make even the most intimidating workload feel more achievable.
  4. Create a homework routine. Consistency can reduce battles. Designate a regular time and quiet space for homework, with minimal distractions and necessary supplies ready.
  5. Know when to walk away. If things get too tense, take a short break. A ten-minute walk or a snack break can help reset everyone’s mood.

How can a parent help their child cope with frustration?

  1. Ask for help early. If something doesn’t make sense, encourage your child to ask questions before frustration builds up. It’s okay not to know everything right away.
  2. Use a timer. Working in short bursts, like 25 minutes followed by a 5-minute break, can improve focus and reduce mental fatigue. This technique, known as the Pomodoro Method, works well for all ages.
  3. Keep a positive attitude. Teach kids to replace negative self-talk (“I can’t do this”) with encouraging phrases (“I’ll try my best” or “I can ask for help”).
  4. Celebrate progress. Finishing a tough assignment deserves recognition. Whether it’s verbal praise or a small reward, celebrating effort motivates kids to keep going.

If homework struggles persist and are severe, it may be time to discuss them with the teacher. Sometimes the issue lies with unclear instructions, learning differences, or workload expectations that need adjustment.

Ultimately, homework doesn’t have to be a nightly battle. With patience, structure, and empathy, parents and kids can turn frustration into an opportunity for growth and hopefully enjoy the process of learning together.

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