Tag Archive for: homework

The Homework Struggle: How Parents and Kids Can Cope Without Conflict

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by Britney Wagler, MSW, LCSW – September 3, 2025 –

As the school year settles into full swing, many households find themselves battling a familiar evening routine: the “homework struggle.” It’s a time that often brings stress, frustration, and even tears for both parent and child. With the right coping strategies, however, parents and kids can transform homework time into a more positive and productive experience.

Homework frustration stems from a mix of factors. For students, it can be a lack of understanding, fatigue after a long school day, or feeling overwhelmed by excessive work. For parents, watching their child struggle, especially when they want to help but don’t know how, can quickly lead to tension.

Every parent wants their child to succeed. When a student isn’t doing well, this can lead to frustration. It’s important to remember that frustration is a normal emotion, but how we respond to it makes all the difference to our children.

What can a parent do to minimize the frustration, stress and tears of homework?

  1. Take a step back. Resist the urge to correct or fix mistakes immediately. Let your child attempt the work on their own first. This builds independence and confidence.
  2. Stay calm and supportive. Your tone sets the mood. If your child senses your frustration, they may shut down or mirror that emotion. Take deep breaths, stay positive, and remind them and yourself that learning takes time.
  3. Break it down. Help your child break assignments into smaller, manageable tasks. This can make even the most intimidating workload feel more achievable.
  4. Create a homework routine. Consistency can reduce battles. Designate a regular time and quiet space for homework, with minimal distractions and necessary supplies ready.
  5. Know when to walk away. If things get too tense, take a short break. A ten-minute walk or a snack break can help reset everyone’s mood.

How can a parent help their child cope with frustration?

  1. Ask for help early. If something doesn’t make sense, encourage your child to ask questions before frustration builds up. It’s okay not to know everything right away.
  2. Use a timer. Working in short bursts, like 25 minutes followed by a 5-minute break, can improve focus and reduce mental fatigue. This technique, known as the Pomodoro Method, works well for all ages.
  3. Keep a positive attitude. Teach kids to replace negative self-talk (“I can’t do this”) with encouraging phrases (“I’ll try my best” or “I can ask for help”).
  4. Celebrate progress. Finishing a tough assignment deserves recognition. Whether it’s verbal praise or a small reward, celebrating effort motivates kids to keep going.

If homework struggles persist and are severe, it may be time to discuss them with the teacher. Sometimes the issue lies with unclear instructions, learning differences, or workload expectations that need adjustment.

Ultimately, homework doesn’t have to be a nightly battle. With patience, structure, and empathy, parents and kids can turn frustration into an opportunity for growth and hopefully enjoy the process of learning together.

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Organization is Key to Your Teen’s Success

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By Dawn Tedrow, LCSW – January 14, 2020

Many teens struggle with forgetting daily assignments and losing their homework, or they become overwhelmed thinking about the amount of work that needs to be completed. Being unorganized creates tremendous stress for people. 

It is important to teach our students good organizational skills to not only reduce stress at school but to help them continue to be successful throughout life.  I have some useful tips for helping your teen become more organized.

First and foremost, get them in the habit of using an agenda book. Most school bookstores sell them to students for a small fee. If they aren’t already in the habit of using an agenda book, I recommend reminding them daily and rewarding them with praise until they have gotten used to carrying it to every class and filling it out. 

I also recommend that students write in the book even if they don’t have an assignment due, by simply noting, “No homework.”  This will help them get into the habit of using the book during every class. If they forget to use it, simply remind them to start again. 

You can easily see if it is being used by sitting down with your teen at a designated time to review what homework needs to be completed each day.  Using positive and encouraging statements will help them view this as a pleasant task rather than you “nagging” at them.

Try to find ways to make the agenda book more interesting by purchasing different color ink pens or stickers.  I use different colors of sticky notes to put extra notes in my planner.  I find most agenda books to be too small for all of my tasks. If your teen runs into this problem, you might consider purchasing a planner with larger spaces for notes. 

One of my favorite planners is the Panda Planner, which can be purchased at www.pandaplanner.com.  The spaces are larger, allowing for more room to write necessary details about assignments to be completed.  They also break down according to the week and help teach the individual how to plan their month, week, and day. I easily plan my week and identify the top priority for each day.

Another simple tool for teens is what I refer to as a “homework folder.”  This is such a simple tool to keep homework assignments in a place that is easy to find so they don’t get lost.  I get a red folder with 3 clasps and place sheet protectors inside. 

There should be a sheet protector for each class (even gym) and then an extra one for documents that are sent home for parents, such as picture day or emergency contact forms to be completed.  I use colorful labels to identify each class. The folder is carried to every class. Students are instructed to place homework to be completed inside the appropriately labeled sheet protector. 

Once they have completed the assignment, they place it back in the sheet protector until they turn it in to their teacher. Graded assignments do not go back into the homework folder. They are placed in separate folders for the class. This is a quick and easy way to avoid lost homework.

Supplying your teenager with these simple tools will help them to stay organized and reduce school-related stress and anxiety.

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Encourage Good Study Habits

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By Valorie Dassel, LCSW, Courier & Press, Sept. 6, 2016 –

With school back in session, many families are struggling to transition into a new routine. This is the perfect time to evaluate your child’s strengths and build on them for maximum academic success.

If your child feels ownership in the plan, they are much more likely to do well. Allow your child to help develop their academic plan while you remain firm on the most important aspects. Below are some strategies that many families find helpful.

1. Designate study time. Along with your student, decide on an appropriate amount of time to devote to studying outside of school. Students who require medication to stay focused will likely benefit from studying during the hours right after school. You may also have an unmedicated child who has an abundant amount of energy and needs to have some down time before they focus on homework.  Spending at least an hour on studies each night will help foster good study skills down the road.

2. Have a set day of the week you will check online grades together. If your student struggles to turn in assignments on time, ask them what they feel appropriate consequences should be for late work. As parents you can ultimately decide on more strict consequences if necessary. Consequences that many families find effective are taking the phone/iPod away for a day for each missing assignment, grounding for the following weekend, taking away video game time, or giving a chore for each missing assignment. Be creative! You know what motivates your child. Be careful to give appropriate time for groundings. If the punishment is too long, you risk your child giving up. Consequences should be set together ahead of time and written out so kids know what to expect and parents respond with rational thinking.

3. Encourage consistent use of an agenda book.  For better organization and less stress, encourage kids to develop the habit of writing assignments down when given and reviewing the homework written down before leaving school.

4. Encourage your child to communicate with teachers. If kids are struggling in a particular class, conversations with the teacher about what to study can prove very helpful.

5. Encourage your child to review notes and chapters every evening if they do not use all of their study time for homework. This will reinforce what has been taught and give them a jump on preparing for tests.

6. Look for improvement and brag on good grades. Positive feedback motivates kids. Help them set a small goal for improvement each week.

If the family can establish written study guidelines and have them handy for reference, the parent- child relationship should be less stressful. Many arguments are centered on grades. The key is remaining consistent and staying calm while enforcing guidelines. These steps should give your child more academic success, increased self-esteem and better self-discipline, leading to happier and healthier children and families.

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