Tag Archive for: resiliency

Creating a Resilient Child

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By Camryn Cater, MSW, LSW – August 28, 2024 –

Life can be described as a roller coaster, riding the highs and sometimes dropping to unexpected lows. There are certainly different emotions and feelings we experience along the way.

Resiliency is the ability to adapt well to trauma, tragedy, threats, and other areas of stress. Raising children to be resilient through the highs and lows of this quick ride called “life” is important. The exciting news is that resiliency can be taught.

Resiliency can come from a child’s beliefs, personality traits, and influences in their environment. Children who believe they can influence the world rather than the world controlling who they are can be more resilient to change. They also have a higher chance of controlling emotions and creating better coping skills.

A key component when ensuring your child can be resilient through life’s trials is helping them form connections. Demonstrate and encourage your child to build a support system and get involved in a community to create a resilient environment. Connection provides support during challenging times or situations that may be out of our control.

Self-care is another practice in routine that can ensure your child radiates with resiliency. Self-care is the act of improving or protecting one’s happiness and well-being. This can be as simple as working out, eating healthy foods, and getting enough sleep.

Ensuring your children incorporate enjoyable activities into their routine can also provide them with an outlet during stressful times, while also preserving their happiness. These activities might include clubs, sports, Scouts, music lessons, or other social activities.

Self-care is also knowing when to take a break. Children can have busy schedules or feel overwhelmed from time to time. Ensure they have time to decompress and slow down to process their emotions.

Children or teens that have access to at least one trusted adult in their life are more resilient. Children need an outlet where they can express their emotions in a healthy way. These outlets might include talking to someone like therapists, counselors, a parent/guardian, friend, or another trusted adult.

As a parent/guardian, be open and honest with your school-aged children using simple statements. Be a listening ear even if you are not in agreement with their concerns or emotions. It is essential for children to feel heard. Guide them to problem solve or express themselves in a healthy way.

Teaching your child to set goals is a great habit to start as a family and can create an emotionally well rounded child. Setting goals allows us to see how far we have come and gives the motivation to continue. Goal setting can be as simple as journaling any goals we would like to achieve in the future. Another healthy way to journal is to list what you are proud of accomplishing that day, something that made your day, or simply expressing each emotion you felt. These techniques can guide you to more self-awareness, ultimately making you more flexible with the ebb and flow of life. Taking that step to express yourself (for your eyes only) is one of the most powerful self-improvement techniques one can practice.

Change can be scary for children, teens, and even adults. Help your child understand that change is a part of life. Focusing on the positives of change can lead your child to be more optimistic. Point out the positive changes they have already made, such as moving up a grade at school.

Take steps to teach your child and family unit to be resilient during the highs and lows of the rollercoaster ride of life. Hiding what is happening in their world may only postpone anxiety that can pop up later. Telling them too many details of hardships or tragedy, however, could fuel their fears and worries.

By introducing routine, self-care, connections, goal setting, positivity, and making sure your child has at least one trusted adult to confide in, you can build resiliency and change the way your child adapts to struggles and hardships.

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Resiliency Skills – Bridging the Gap Between School and Home

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By Chelsea Rasch, MSW, LCSW – May 8, 2024 –

America’s youth are in the throes of a mental health crisis. Professionals continue to observe a rise in mental health-related struggles in school-aged children since the COVID-19 pandemic began in 2020.

According to the Center for Disease and Control (CDC), 67 percent of US high school students reported that schoolwork was more difficult; 55 percent experienced emotional abuse in the home; 11 percent experienced physical abuse; and 24 percent reported they did not have enough food to eat during the pandemic.

All of these issues can have a detrimental effect on mental health. Another study conducted by Pew Research Center (2022) found that four in ten US parents have reported being “extremely” or “very” worried about children struggling with anxiety or depression.

To respond to these mental health implications in our school-aged youth, we are seeing a bigger push for mental health services both in and out of the school environment. Children are being referred at alarming frequency for outside therapeutic services and are being seen by psychiatrists/primary care physicians for medication management. Inside schools, we are seeing a bigger push for school behavior interventionists, as well as more counselors and school-based social workers and/or psychologists to combat these mental health-related struggles.

All of these interdisciplinary professionals, schools, and families are working together towards one common goal: to strengthen resiliency skills and supports within our schools and communities to foster successful student outcomes. Resiliency skills refer to our ability to face and adapt to challenges and overcome them.

Many parents have come forward with one common question: How can I help my child build these resiliency skills at home?

  1. Discuss resiliency and coping skills with your children. When we practice and build our skills in self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship building and decision-making, we are better equipped to navigate stressors, anxieties, and challenges. We can solve problems and work together at a higher level—in the classroom, at work and at home. Talk with your child about strategies that help them deal with difficult emotions. Do they practice deep breathing, listening to music? Or do they become argumentative and dysregulated? Identifying your child’s coping and resiliency patterns can give you a foundation to build upon.

  2. Model the behavior you wish to see. Children learn by watching their parents. One way to foster resiliency skills in children is to model these healthy behaviors at home. Dealing with difficult feelings/situations in an appropriate way and including children in these conversations can help build these skills. It’s important to stay calm and realistic. Children sense when we are worried and anxious, and our emotions can directly affect the emotions of our children. Remember, no one is perfect; it is not realistic to expect yourself to respond the right way every time. Practice keeping yourself regulated so you can model emotional regulation for your child.

  3. Remember the importance of self-care. Children are often sensitive to the stress of their caregivers. To cultivate their resiliency skills, we must ensure we are taking care of our own mental, social, and emotional wellness. Building in time (even if it’s only 15 minutes per day) for our own wellness practices – journaling, walking, meditating, exercising – can not only help model appropriate self-care, but also mitigate our own stress levels. Much like putting on your own oxygen mask before putting on a child’s, take care of yourself so you’re able to show up for others. If this is difficult for you, start out with a small goal and build on it. For example, listen to your favorite music for a “mindfulness moment” or go on a short walk at the beginning or end of the day.
     
  4. Connect with school/community professionals. Research and connect with professionals in your community to discuss how to optimize your child’s resiliency skills and success. Reach out to community providers, agencies, or local non-profits for additional education and activities. Connecting your child with a local club (YMCA, Boy Scouts, etc.) can be a great way to build resiliency skills and connect them with other children. Reach out to your child’s Youth First Mental Health Professional or school counselor to discuss additional ways to support your child.

  5. Practice, practice, practice! Regularly practicing healthy coping skills in response to stress is imperative, just as it is for any other skill like reading, math, or dribbling a basketball. In the same way we practice those skills, we have to practice identifying, expressing, and managing our emotions. By continually doing so, we build a toolkit we can readily draw upon to navigate stressors or de-escalate conflicts.
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Everyday Gratitude Can Improve Your Life

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By Leah Lottes , LSW – Jan. 21, 2020

For many, the recent holidays reminded us to be thankful no matter what our circumstances are, focusing on being thankful for what we have rather than what we don’t have. The holidays are a great time to express gratitude. However, expressing gratitude every day is even better!

Gratitude is beneficial for your mental and physical health, so why not express gratitude every day?

As listed by Amy Morin on the website psychologytoday.com, here are some of the ways gratitude can benefit you:

Gratitude can improve your physical health. People who express gratitude tend to experience fewer aches and pains. These individuals are also more likely to take care of their health by attending regular doctor visits and maintaining a healthy diet with exercise.

Gratitude can help you sleep better. If you express gratitude at the end of the day by writing down a few things you are thankful for, you increase your chances of having a better night of sleep.

Gratitude can help boost your self-esteem. When you are thankful, you are more likely to appreciate your positive life experiences rather than focus on the negative ones. You are also less likely to compare yourself to others which can help you appreciate the accomplishments of others. Gratitude is also likely to increase your overall happiness.

Gratitude can help foster resiliency. Expressing gratitude is a great way to cope with stress and trauma at any time in your life. 

One of the best things about gratitude is that you can express it at any age. Because gratitude has been proven to have so many benefits, the younger you teach children about it, the better.

According to Dr. Kevin Solomons’ website borntobeworthless.com, there are many ways you can express gratitude throughout the day. The easiest way is by simply saying thank you to people when they help you out. Thanking someone for their help not only makes that person feel good but also makes you feel good, which encourages you to keep saying thank you.

When adults say thank you to others, this encourages kids and adolescents to do the same. Parents and teachers can model this behavior every day to students at home and in the classroom.  

Another way to express gratitude is to send thank you notes. This is a very good way to encourage kids and adolescents to say thank you. When you instill the habit in them when they are younger they are more likely to continue the habit throughout their lives.

It’s also important to teach kids that writing thank you notes isn’t just for gifts. A nice hand-written note can be sent to show appreciation when someone does something special for them.

An additional way to express daily gratitude is by keeping a journal. This can be something as simple as writing one thing you’re thankful for each day. Getting into a routine of adding to your journal allows you to train your brain to be thankful every day. Teachers can incorporate gratitude into their days by taking having students write down what they are thankful for or allow them to share their gratitude out loud. Parents can also do this activity together with their kids to show what they are thankful for and how it is important to their lives.

Expressing gratitude has many benefits. It may seem like a small task, but it’s the little things that can make such a big difference. Gratitude positively affects your mindset and your lifestyle, and that in itself is a reason to be thankful.  

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