Understanding Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs)

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By Ashley Underwood, MSW, LCSW, Youth First, Inc.

How does one describe a traumatic event? Traumatic is defined as “emotionally disturbing or distressing,” which can vary from person to person, so that question has many answers.

“Adverse Childhood Experience” is a term that refers to various forms of trauma individuals may experience in childhood. This includes experiencing violence, abuse or neglect, witnessing violence in the home or community, having a family member attempt or die by suicide, growing up in a household with substance use problems or mental health problems, or instability due to parental separation or incarcerated family members.

According to the CDC, about 61% of adults surveyed across 25 states reported they had experienced at least one type of ACE before age 18, and nearly 1 in 6 reported they had experienced four or more types of ACEs.

There is a direct link between ACEs and physical health. Unfortunately, for each adverse child experience, there is an increased risk of chronic health issues. Center for Youth Wellness shares that those individuals experiencing 4 or more ACEs are associated with significantly increased risk for 7 out of 10 leading adult causes of death, including heart disease, stroke, cancer, COPD, diabetes, Alzheimer’s, and suicide.

There is also significant detriment that can occur to a child’s brain when experiencing that amount of stress. Experiencing ACEs can impact attention span, memory, stress response, immune system, emotion regulation, decision making skills, and overall learning. We see many of these issues in the school setting on a daily basis, and sadly, it is related to the amount of trauma our children have experienced.

What can we do to help? Prevention is key. The CDC recommends the following six strategies for helping to prevent ACEs:

  • Strengthen economic support for families. This includes churches, community organizations, and non-profits helping with financial distress as well as employers providing adequate pay, time off, and benefits for employees.
  • Promote social norms that protect against violence and adversity. Work to create safe spaces for children and adults to talk about mental health challenges and reinforce the motto, “See something, say something” for children in regards to acts of violence, bullying, abuse, etc.
  • Ensure a strong start for children. This can include funding early education programs for families with affordable options, as well as increasing in-home learning options for parents.
  • Teach skills. Allow programs in schools that promote and teach emotional regulation, conflict resolution, social skills, and boundaries.
  • Connect youth to caring adults and activities. “Every kid is one caring adult away from being a success story.” -Josh Shipp

Get kids involved in mentoring programs like Big Brothers Big Sisters, encourage teachers to put them in leadership roles at school, have them join after school activities like choir, intramurals, or scouting.

  • Intervene to lessen immediate and long-term harms. Educate the public on ACEs, the risk factors, and the support available including treatment options, resource assistance, and organizations that promote these things.

Let’s do our part! For more information about the ACEs, check out https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/aces/index.html

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Developing Resiliency in Children

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By Niki Walls, MSW, LSW, Youth First, Inc.

Resiliency is something many of our children utilize unknowingly every day. So, what exactly is resiliency? Resiliency is building immunity to stressors and adversity; or in other words, the many ways we can adapt and learn from stressful experiences. Resiliency is more of an adaptive skill that is trainable and less of a fixed personality trait.

Developing resiliency can help students stand up to bullies, lose a competitive event with grace, say no to negative influences, and even cope with traumatic experiences like abuse or neglect. The adverse childhood experiences that some children face do not discriminate by age, gender, or location, although certain populations are more vulnerable. Although we all face stressors of various kinds, the way we are taught to cope with those stressors determines our ability to overcome adversity.

Resiliency can be tricky to measure because not all stressful events are the same. The way children respond to stressors can influence the severity of the stressor itself. Some situations may seem mild to some and very serious to others. Sometimes stressors are short lived while others last quite a long time.

The way children learn from stressful experiences is a key part of building resiliency. They must be able to grow and adapt from the stressful events they face instead of accepting defeat. Focusing on the growth perspective and positive circumstances will help them improve their ability to bounce back from stressful situations. Working on developing appropriate coping skills and mindfulness strategies is also important when considering resiliency development.

In the past few years, our children have faced multiple stressful events. They have lived through a pandemic and the challenges it brought with it, such as virtual learning, heightened anxiety, financial hardships, loss, and more. Children have proved their resiliency in ways adults had not prepared them for. While it has been challenging, children have been able to grow and strengthen their resiliency despite negative circumstances.

The world can only hope children are able to look back on some of the difficult events that unfolded in the last few years and recognize the ways they became stronger. As adult role models, we can model resiliency for our children by managing our responses to these types of stressful events. The more we respond capably to adversity in front of children, the more we increase their resiliency and the likelihood they grow to become healthy, well-adjusted young adults.

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Handling the Terrible Twos

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By Sarah Audu, MSW, LSW, Youth First, Inc.

It seems all new parents are warned about the much-dreaded “terrible twos.” I have reflected upon my own journey as a new mom and have given this phrase much thought and consideration.

Throughout pregnancy, new parents dream of what their child will be like, and their love for this child is already indescribable. When the child is born, our love for them only grows a million times more. At the same time, parents are trying to figure out how to care for a tiny human, which is a process full of self-doubt and deep emotions.

Society understands that having a newborn is hard, and support is commonly shown to new parents. Is that same support always given to parents when their baby grows into a toddler?

Imagine a time when you’ve seen a toddler throw a tantrum at the grocery store. Situations like those can often be viewed as annoying, obnoxious, or simply the result of bad parenting. Now that I am the mother of a two-year-old, I have more respect for parents raising toddlers, because this phase is not for the weak! (LOL)

Behavioral tantrums can include kicking, hitting, crying, screaming, throwing themselves on the ground, rolling around, and more. Tantrums may be triggered by something that upset the child, such as being told “no,” or can occur for seemingly no reason at all.

These negative behavioral outbursts are extremely defeating for parents. Parents are typically putting their best effort towards teaching their children to behave positively, make good choices, communicate effectively, and calm down when they are upset.

In my own experience, I try my best to teach my child positive social-emotional skills and practice these things with him daily. However, that did not stop him from screaming, kicking, and refusing to walk with me when we were trying to leave a restaurant.

One arm was carrying a heavy infant seat with my 8-month-old, and my other arm was carrying my toddler, who was still screaming and refusing to walk. I received many annoyed stares from bystanders, and the looks on their faces just communicated, “Why can’t you get him to stop?” I was trying everything. I felt so defeated.

I am forever grateful for the woman who stopped me right before I reached the door and said, “Would you care if I helped you?”

What needs to be remembered is that toddlers are still trying to figure out this big world. They are trying to learn to communicate and express themselves. They are trying to find their independence.

As I reflect on my experiences, the word that comes to mind is “grace.” As adults and parents, we should put more effort into showing grace to toddlers as they navigate the world. We should show more grace to other parents, as they are trying their best. Lastly, we should be intentional about showing grace to ourselves, as we have earned it as well.

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Holiday Stress and Your Anxious Child

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By Brooke Skipper, MSW, LCSW, Youth First, Inc.

No school, sweet treats, presents, and parties…You might think this is every kid’s dream! If you have a child with anxiety, however, you know this combination can be a huge trigger.

While a long school vacation might feel like a relief for many kids, the break in routine can be difficult for those with anxitety. The parties, loud noises, and bright lights can create sensory overload for anxious kids.

For children who struggle with anxiety or who are simply more introverted, the constant activity and socializing can be very overwhelming. To minimize meltdowns, tantrums, and stress for the whole family, work on coping ahead of time by employing some simple strategies.

1.    Identify the warning signs. Talk with your child about how their body feels when they are anxious. Are they experiencing sweating, racing heart, or butterflies in their bellies? Pay attention to your child’s behavior during anxious times. Some warning signs may be:

·       Excessive tears or clinging to parents

·       Isolating

·       Psychosomatic complaints (headaches, stomach aches, random pains that cannot be explained)

2.    Create coping strategies. Once you and your child understand the warning signs, know what to do to decrease anxiety before it spirals. The more a child can practice these coping skills, the better at them they will become. Make sure your child’s favorite coping tools go with you to events and outings. Some easy skills to try are:

·       Journaling

·       Music

·       Art expression

·       Exercise

·       Deep breathing

·       Fidgets or stress balls

3.    Set expectations. Let your child know what the schedule for the day is. Describe the events you will be attending, who will be there, and what your child may enjoy while there. This helps your child feel more in control and less anxious.

4.    Make time to reconnect. With the holidays full of busy schedules and lots of family and friends, it can be hard to have meaningful one-on-one time with your child. An anxious kid craves that slow-paced rest and relaxation time spent with you as their safety net. Find time to recharge with your child each day, talk through how they are feeling, and identify any needs they have.

Children thrive on routine. Finding ways to maintain some form of normalcy during this chaotic time can be extremely beneficial for an anxious child. Try to ensure your child gets plenty of restful sleep and eats nutritious meals, even if bedtimes and mealtimes shift to accommodate events.

Remember, you are your child’s best advocate. If there is an event that just does not work for your family, it is ok to maintain boundaries and not attend.

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What Kids Really Need This Holiday Season

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By Jana Pritchett, Communications Manager at Youth First, Inc. – Updated 12/15/2022

Christmas is almost here, and kids everywhere are hoping to be on Santa’s good list. Popular toys like Squishmellows and LOL Dolls are on many kids’ lists, as are classics such as Star Wars figurines, LEGO sets, and Barbie.

We all hope to give our children the presents they want, but what do our kids really need from adults this holiday season? What gifts can mom, dad or grandparents provide to help them become happy, healthy, successful adults?

Here is my list of the essentials:

1.     Security and stability. Kids need the basics — food, shelter, clothing, medical care and protection. In addition, a stable home and family environment make them feel safe, and being part of a family gives them a sense of belonging.

2.     Full attention. Be present. Turn off your phone, the TV and all gadgets and listen to them, especially at mealtimes and bedtime. Removing distractions lets them know they’re special and there’s no need to compete for your attention.

3.     Time. Spend quality family time together. Take the whole family to pick out a Christmas tree or to see a ballgame or holiday concert. Take each child on mom and dad “dates” to create special memories and boost their self-esteem, especially if they’re used to sharing parent time with siblings. Spending quality time together encourages deeper conversations and strengthens the bonds between parent and child.

4.     Love. Saying and showing your kids you love them can help overcome just about any parenting “mistake” you might make. Even when your kids have disappointed, frustrated, angered or disobeyed you, they must know you will always love them.

5.     Affection. Don’t wait for your children to come to you for hugs. Regular physical affection helps strengthen and maintain your emotional connection with kids of any age. When that bond is strong, kids act out less often and know they can come to you for support.

6.     Emotional support. Through good and bad times, kids must know you are there for them. According to Dr. Harley Rotbart of Children’s Hospital Colorado, “Parents’ words and actions should facilitate kids’ trust, respect, self-esteem and ultimately, independence.”

7.     Consistency. Parents need to work together to enforce rules. Important values should not be compromised for the sake of convenience or because the kids have worn you down. If parents are no longer married, mom and dad should still try to communicate and work together whenever possible to maintain consistency.

8.     Positive role models. Parents are their kids’ first and most important role models. Kids see plenty of bad behavior in the media. Be the kind of person you want them to become and don’t just give “lip service” to good behavior.

9.     Education. Give your kids the best possible shot for their future by stressing the importance of education. Providing guidance and teaching them life lessons during the time you spend together is also important.

Spending quality time with your kids is the best solution for just about any parenting dilemma. This holiday season and in the New Year, don’t stop with what’s on your child’s wish list. Give them what they really need — the gift of being the best parent you can be.

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Supporting Your Teen’s Growing Brain

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By Brandi McCord, Youth First, Inc.

As parents, we always strive to provide for our kids and guide them to become successful adults. During adolescence, the brain grows at a rapid rate and continues to mature until the age of 25. In that time, there are factors that can help brain growth and others that can hinder development.

Let’s dive into some steps we can take as parents to support our teens’ healthy brain development.

  1. Build a balanced home life. Just like outside environmental factors, the home environment can highly affect a teen’s well-being. As parents, we should be loving and supportive to our kids. This includes providing rules and instilling moral behaviors.
  1. Provide healthy experiences. Getting teens involved with a range of activities, hobbies, and experiences can also positively impact brain development. This could include suggesting your teen try out a new sport, having them create some artwork, or even encouraging them to join a club at school.
  1. Establish good sleep habits. Did you know that teens need more sleep than children and adults? Yes, you heard that right. Melatonin levels increase later in the night and drop early in the morning for teens. This explains why teens want to stay up late and then struggle to get up out of bed the next morning. Teens need an average of 9-10 hours of sleep a night. Try and stick with a routine to help unwind from the day. Taking electronics, such as the cell phone, out of their room can also help your teen get more sleep. They may not be happy about it, but just remember it is to help them grow!
  1. Encourage an active lifestyle.  Most of us know that exercise provides many benefits and additional energy! You can use physical activity to bond with your teen by taking a family walk or helping them find physical hobbies they enjoy.
  1. Offer healthy options. Brains need nourishment from a healthy, balanced diet. Try to help your teen avoid junk food and increase their intake of healthy foods like fruits and veggies. These nutrients help the brain thrive and develop.
  1. Develop a plan to manage stress. When your brain gets stressed, it does not develop appropriately. Work with your teen on developing a stress plan to keep the stress levels at a minimum. It’s helpful to find a plan that works for you too! Relaxation techniques such as yoga and mindfulness, along with healthy outlets like reading and writing can help reduce stress levels.
  1. Protect the brain from injury. Safety and protection are key for a brain to grow and mature. Encourage helmet safety and the use of seatbelt, along with discouraging use of harmful substances (drugs, alcohol, etc.). Teens are always looking for guidance and will look to you to help them. This is a great opportunity to model healthy behaviors.
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Holiday Gratitude and Giving are Good for Your Mental Health

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By Julie Hoon, Youth First, Inc. – Updated 12/7/2022

The busy holiday season brings many priorities, and our mental health does not always earn a spot at the top of the list. However, gratitude and giving can have a direct link to improved health, increased happiness, and infinite joy…especially this time of year.

As a fundraiser for Youth First, I hear story after story about the joy that comes from giving. Our donors experience feelings of connectedness, wellness, and life satisfaction when they donate to Youth First, because they are giving to a cause they care about. They are helping kids thrive and are positively impacting the future of their community.

In fact, gratitude and giving are contagious, as I was recently reminded by Youth First donors James and Diane VanCleave. James and Diane have a heartfelt Christmas gift for one another that impacts kids and avoids the hectic hustle and bustle of the holiday rush: they each make a donation to Youth First in honor of their spouse.

“There was nothing material we could give each other that we didn’t have,” says Diane about their Christmas ritual, “so one year, James said he was making a donation to Youth First for Christmas on my behalf. I immediately said that I would like to do the same.” Years later, their gifts to Youth First have become a holiday tradition. James makes the first donation in honor of Diane, and then Diane makes her donation in honor of James.

James, an Evansville Police Department officer who worked as a school liaison officer for the Evansville Vanderburgh School Corporation after retirement, says he saw firsthand the value of Youth First Social Workers as an intervention for students to talk to rather than a police officer getting involved. Diane, a Youth First Social Worker who worked with Youth First founder Dr. Bill Wooten at the Mulberry Center early in her career, says social workers and teachers are making a change for kids and influencing lives. She says, “It just makes sense to support this work.”

Gratitude and giving can cause delightful spillover effects. When donating to a cause you love, you might see the ripple effect in your life from family, to friends, to work, and to yourself. Giving brings about a sense of gratitude for what we’ve been blessed with, along with happiness and joy in knowing you are helping others. Studies highlight an association with well-being and gratitude, resulting in fewer doctor’s visits, taking better care of self, and improved relationships. With giving, many people experience greater satisfaction in life, reduced stress, and a healthier outlook in general, both physically and mentally. 

Perhaps this season your holiday list may include giving to a charity you love? If so, I can assure you that joy and happiness will follow. Our community thrives and so does your mental health. James and Diane certainly agree that their Christmas gifts of giving to Youth First are a natural extension from their hearts to give back to their community. “Plus, it’s the perfect gift,” adds James. “It always fits and you will never have to return it!” 

Julie Hoon is the Vice President of Philanthropy for Youth First. If you would like to find out more about how to make a donation to Youth First, please contact Julie at jhoon@youthfirstinc.org. Youth First, Inc., a nonprofit dedicated to strengthening youth and families, provides 83 Master’s level social workers to 110 schools in 12 Indiana counties. Over 60,000 youth and families per year are served by Youth First’s school social work and after school programs that prevent substance abuse, promote healthy behaviors and maximize student success. To learn more about Youth First, visit youthfirstinc.org or call 812-421-8336.

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School and Parent Communication is Vital

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By Nolan Miller, MSW, LSW, Youth First, Inc.

Throughout the school year, kids are constantly learning new material and building upon their strengths. Even after the first day jitters dissipate and students settle into a routine, new academic and social stressors can emerge that cause anxiety for students. As a parent you want the best for your child, and the teacher wants the best for their student.

Teachers can’t always perceive when a student is having a rough day or is struggling with something socially. Parents are more likely to notice if their child is coming home upset or just seems off. The only way to help fix the situation is with communication. This could be as simple as talking to your child at home to see what is going on and reaching out to their teacher to express your concerns.

Communication between the school and parents is vital to a child’s success. If a student is struggling with a subject, a teacher can relay that information to their parent to start a plan towards improvement. If a student is stressed and upset about something going on at home, letting their teacher know they are having a rough day can allow the teacher to be on the lookout. Building that trust with the teacher, as well as the school, can allow your child to find success.

Good communication starts from day one on Meet the Teacher Night. It is important to understand how to contact your child’s teacher and to be aware of the expectations your child will have in the classroom. Make sure the school always has up-to-date contact information for you. This is vital, not only to keep you as a parent in the loop, but to keep your child safe if emergencies occur.

Another way to keep communication flowing is to volunteer when you can. Many schools allow parents to come in and tutor or help a teacher with extra work that needs to be completed. This will allow you to be a part of your child’s life while they are going to school and help you understand what goes on from day to day.

One of the last ways that you can get involved at your child’s school would be to join the PTO. Parent Teacher Organizations can serve as extensions of the staff and help strengthen the bond between parents, teachers, administration, and your community as a whole. 

Understanding what your child does on a day-to-day basis avoids any miscommunication between schools and parents. Working as a team is best and will help our students find success.

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Giving Tuesday

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Giving Tuesday is a day of global generosity. Whether it is time, money, or advocacy, Giving Tuesday inspires us to give back to the causes close to our hearts.

What a wonderful opportunity to celebrate Youth First’s programs and services and the positive impact they have on over 50,000 students across Indiana!

Learn more about Giving Tuesday at givingtuesday.org. You can make a donation to Youth First at our Donate Page at youthfirstinc.org/donate.

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Snapchat and Internet Safety

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By Beth Greene, MSW, LSW, Youth First, Inc.

Teens often use social media to socialize. Although the internet is an amazing tool for our children, that reality is that it can also negatively affect their mental health and safety.

It is very important that parents stay up to date on the apps their child is using, set clear expectations for internet usage, and be aware of who their children are socializing with on social media.

Over the past five years, Snapchat has emerged as a platform ripe for bullying and online predators. Bullies will create groups or make stories on their profile to display embarrassing photos, make fun of, degrade, spread rumors, and threaten their victims.

Pictures and messages directly sent to a user immediately disappear after the message is viewed, and if someone posts on his or her story, it only stays up for only 24 hours. This can make it very difficult to gather evidence when students report issues to adults.

Although pictures and messages appear to vanish, they never actually go away within the app. It should be noted that if a crime has taken place, such as death threats or potential contact with a sexual predator, law enforcement can gain access to Snapchat accounts with a warrant.

Another concerning Snapchat feature is the “Snap Map,” which displays a user’s location to their snapchat contacts. To disable this feature, an account user must go into settings to “ghost” themselves so their friends cannot see their location. If you do not “ghost” yourself, anyone on your friends list can always see your exact location. When you get into a car and drive, Snapchat will even show your friends your movements in real time.

If a Snapchat account is not private, that account can receive messages and pictures from any stranger. Even if the account is private, Snapchat has a points system set up to give more points to users with the most friends, along with other creative ways to earn points. This encourages children to accept friend requests from strangers to gain points.

Because of these features, children become victims of unsolicited inappropriate images from child predators who have easy access to our children through this app. These predators can create an online relationship with a child to exploit them and gain access to their location.

Recently Snapchat has added its first parental control called “Family Center.” To use this feature, both parent and child must have a Snapchat account and both users must accept the request to use the Family Center feature. This feature allows parents to see who is on their child’s friend list, see whom they have communicated with most often in the past seven days, and it allows parents to report concerning accounts to Snapchat’s Safety Team.

Overall, Snapchat is currently one of the most used social media apps by teens, but it continues to maintain unsafe features. Inform your children that what they post on Snapchat never goes away and that law enforcement can get a warrant for other users’ accounts if your child falls victim to an online crime. Set clear expectations for internet/social media use and talk to your child about internet safety.

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