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Giving Back – Look for the Helpers

Family Care, Featured, High School

When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”

Mister Rogers

In times like these, not only can we look for the helpers, we can find even more fulfillment by being one. 

While it serves no purpose for anyone to put themselves in harm’s way if they are not adequately trained to do so safely, many of us can still give back to our community in its time of need. 

Some examples are listed below: 

  • Foster a pet: Uncertain finances will lead to an increased number of abandoned animals in shelters. 
  • Donate blood: This may not be possible for those under age 18, but college students and adults can give back by giving blood. 
  • Check on elderly neighbors: Do their grocery shopping if you feel you can do so safely or just make sure to call them regularly. They will be even more isolated than the rest of us and may need more human contact in whatever form possible. 
  • Volunteer Virtually: Idealist has a list of volunteer opportunities in classrooms and communities across the globe 
  • Don’t waste your food: Take extra care to freeze food before it expires, don’t wash produce until you’re ready for it, and store raw and cooked food properly. 
  • Clean out your closets: You may have to hold off on making your donations depending on restrictions, but be prepared to donate to your local shelter, Good Will, or Salvation Army as soon as you are able to. 
  • Send notes: Send cards and letters to your local nursing homes or write thank you notes to your local health care workers! 
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Grounding Exercise

Family Care, High School

 Use your senses to calm your mind. Identify the following:

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Focus on What You Can Control

Family Care, Featured, High School

Often times our anxiety and thoughts can take over and make us feel like we don’t have much control. One way to combat this is to focus on what we can control. However, it can sometimes be a struggle to identify these things when we are feeling anxious. 

Identify and write out some things that you CAN control. Keep them in a jar and when your emotions feel out of control, pull one out to complete the activity, reflect, or even journal about the topic. 

Here is a list of examples you can use or help guide you to create your own. Things I CAN control: 

  • Keeping my word 
  • How I talk to myself 
  • When and if I forgive others 
  • How truthful and honest I am 
  • When I take mindful breaths 
  • The goals I set for myself 
  • When I need and break (and actually take one) 
  • Treating others with kindness 
  • How much effort I put into things 
  • When I ask for help 
  • How I respond to challenges 
  • Reminding myself I am enough and worthy 
  • How I take care of my body 
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“Chopped” Cooking Competition

Family Care, High School

For some family fun with your teen, have a “Chopped” Cooking Competition! 

Most of us have heard of the Food Network’s cooking competition show, “Chopped,” where four chefs face off against one another to prepare an amazing three-course meal consisting of an appetizer, entrée and dessert. The catch is that they have to use only the ingredients the show provides them. 

You can have your own version of a cooking competition using only ingredients in your house! (Make sure to make participants aware of any “off limits” ingredients.) 

Set a timer, designate one family member to be the judge, and the rest of you can start cooking to compete for the best dish in the house! 

When your family sits down to try the dishes, get conversation “cooking” too with these questions: 

  • Share what you liked best about the experience. 
  • What was difficult about the challenge? 
  • What would you have changed about the meal you prepared? 
  • Talk about your favorite food. 
  • What types of dishes would you like to create next? 
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Life Skills Conversations with Your Teen

Family Care, Featured, High School
  • How to take a message 
  • How to write a letter 
  • How to balance a check book 
  • How to weigh pros and cons of a decision 
  • How to make a budget 
  • How to ask questions to get to know someone better
  • How to select a gift the recipient will appreciate 
  • How to make a genuine apology 
  • How to introduce yourself 
  • How to read a map 
  • How to manage time 
  • How to find a book in the library 
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50 Thought-Provoking Questions to Ask Your Teen

Family Care, High School
  1. Which would you rather have: $1 million today or 1 cent doubled every day for 30 days? (This teaches your teen about compound interest.) 
  2. Would you rather be the boss or employee, and what would make you better at one position versus the other? 
  3. If you could have only one superpower, what would it be? 
  4. Describe yourself in 5 words or less. 
  5. If you could give every person in the world a gift but it would have to be the same gift, what would that gift be? 
  6. Imagine you’re the President and you need to have 3 people to assist you. Who would you pick and why? 
  7. If you could set one rule for the family that we all have to follow, what would it be? 
  8. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be? 
  9. When do you feel a child or teen becomes an adult? 
  10. What have you learned in life that you feel will be the most useful? 
  11. Describe what a perfect day would be from the moment you wake up until bedtime. 
  12. If you could change anything in the world, what 3 things would it be and why? 
  13. If you could eat dinner with 3 people you don’t know, who would it be and where would you go? 
  14. Do you think it’s better to have one great skill you’re an A+ at or many skills you’re a C at and why? 
  15. What’s the best invention you’ve seen most recently and what do you like about it? 
  16. What makes our family amazing that you feel is unique about us? 
  17. What are 3 things you are grateful for in your life, and why? 
  18. What are 3 really small victories that you’ve had in the last few days that you’re proud of? 
  19. What’s a hobby that you don’t currently have that you’d love to learn? What’s holding you back? 
  20. What do you feel are the most important things to living a great life? 
  21. If we lost everything we owned today but could keep 3 things, what would you pick and why? 
  22. Imagine you’re the teacher tomorrow at school. What are 3 things you’d teach that you think would help make school more useful for one’s future? 
  23. When someone is feeling stressed, what are 3 suggestions you’d share with them on how to feel less stressed? 
  24. What do you feel is the hardest job in the world and why? 
  25. How would you explain the word “love” to someone without using the word “love?” 
  26. Do you believe money can or can’t buy happiness? 
  27. Think of the worst thing that’s happened to you…what did you learn from it? 
  28. Of all the things you’re learning, what do you think will be most useful as an adult? 
  29. If you could travel back in time 3 years, what advice would you give yourself? 
  30. Which of your friends do you think I would like most? Why? 
  31. If you could grow up to be famous, what would you be famous for? 
  32. How would you change the world if you could? 
  33. How can you help someone today? 
  34. If you could make one rule that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be? 
  35. If you had enough money that you never had to work, what would you do with your time? 
  36. Have you passed up on any chances that you now regret? What were they? 
  37. If you were told you would live forever, what would you change about your life? 
  38. What are you most afraid of? 
  39. What do you think is keeping you from complete happiness? 
  40. What’s your greatest strength and your greatest weakness? 
  41. What is the achievement you’re most proud of and why? 
  42. What’s one thing you did in the last 24 hours to make someone’s life better? 
  43. Where in the world would you most like to live? 
  44. What’s had the greatest impact on your life, good or bad, and why? 
  45. What do you do when you can’t sleep at night? 
  46. If we experience our greatest moments of growth and learning from failure, why are we so afraid to fail? 
  47. What product would you stockpile if you found out it wasn’t going to be sold anymore? 
  48. Do you have any bad habits you wish you could break? What are they? 
  49. If you had no physical, financial or other obstacles, what skill would you like to have? 
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Coping Skills

Family Care, High School

…or “Getting Through Life” Skills.

Self Soothing/Self Care Ideas

Use different senses…

  • Wear your favorite sweatshirt
  • Take a walk in the grass with no shoes on
  • Smell candles or flowers
  • Find all the square or green objects in the room
  • Observe and describe an object: color, texture, shadow, light, shape
  • Get a massage
  • Calming Bottles

Grounding Exercise

Look around and name:

  • 5 things you can see
  • 4 things you can feel
  • 3 things you can hear
  • 2 things you can smell
  • 1 things you can taste

Distraction

Again this is anything that takes your mind off of the negative or stressful things for a bit.

What else can you do to distract your mind?

Opposite Action

Again this is where you do the opposite of what you are feeling or what you want to do.

If you are sad…watch a funny movie or YouTube video, look at funny memes, or read a joke book.

If you are feeling stressed or unmotivated…look up inspirational quotes or exercise.

Just DON’T Give Up. Failing at something does not make you a failure.

Emotional Awareness

Anything that has to do with identifying and expressing your emotions…

  • Journaling
  • Drawing
  • Painting
  • Poems
  • Creating Music

Identify Your Emotions

Mindfulness

Being Mindful really means being in the present. It means not dwelling on the past and not stressing/worrying about the future. You must focus on the here and now.

See: Counsellor Talk – Coping Skills Just 4 You for Teens Ideas from A-Z

Square Breathing

Square breathing for mindfulness & relaxation

  • Step 1: Inhale for 4 counts
  • Step 2: Hold breath for 4 counts
  • Step 3: Exhale for 4 counts
  • Step 4: Repeat steps one through three 4 times

4-7-8 Breathing

  • Lay or sit with one hand on your chest and another on your belly.
  • Take a deep slow breath from your belly, counting to 4 as you breath in.
  • Hold your breath while mentally counting 1 to 7.
  • Release your breath completely and slowly, while silently counting from 1 to 8.
  • Repeat 3 to 7 times or until you feel calm.

Crisis Plan

Talk with a trusted adult (parent, friends parent, teacher, counselor, nurse, coach, etc.)

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

  • 1-800-273-TALK
  • www.suicideprevntionlifeline.org

National Hopeline Network

  • 1-800-SUICIDE
  • www.imalive.org

Deaconess Cross Pointe

  • 812-476-7200

Samaritan Center

  • 812-354-8785
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Anxiety Breakdown Journal

Family Care, High School

Sometimes we have anxiety or worrisome thoughts about stressors in our lives. Often these thoughts grow and fester to the point where our brain is no longer thinking logically about the situation. Sometimes it helps to just break down your thoughts and reactions and see if you can get a different perspective. 

Use the linked file below to follow along and fill in your own entries.

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10 Self-Care Tips

Family Care, Featured, Self-Care

1. Practice Deep Breathing – During periods of anxiety, the body triggers a stress re- sponse. Breathing becomes shallow and rapid, heart rate increases, and the body be- comes tense. You can combat the stress response by triggering the relaxation response with deep breathing. Breathing becomes deeper and slower and the symptoms of anxie- ty fade away. You can practice deep breathing by breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth like you are blowing out through a straw. You can adjust the counts as needed, but a good place to start is to breathe in for 4 counts, hold for 4 counts, and breathe out for 6 counts, making sure your belly fully expands.

2. Practice Mindfulness Meditation – The goal of mindfulness meditation is simple: to pay attention to the present moment, without judgement. During mindfulness meditation, you will focus on your breathing as a tool to ground yourself in the present moment. It’s normal that your mind will wander. You’ll simply bring yourself back into the moment by refocusing on your breathing. Aim to practice daily for at least 15 minutes. There are lots of good apps for this including Headspace, Calm or even YouTube.

3. Move Your Body – Squeezing in 30 minutes of physical activity a day can make a huge difference in your mood. Exercise triggers the release of chemicals such as serotonin and endorphins in the brain and central nervous system which will help you feel happier, more relaxed, and sleep better too.

4. Prioritize Sleep – Getting enough sleep is one of the most important things humans can do for our physical and mental health. The National Sleep Foundation recommends 7-9 hours for adults. Sticking to a sleep schedule will help you feel better and be better equipped to handle stress.

5. Spend Time with Your Pets – From giving unconditional love to providing companion- ship, pets can be hugely beneficial for our self-care. Dogs especially can help reduce stress and feelings of anxiety and can even lower blood pressure. Try taking your dog for a walk or even just hunker up on the couch and give your pet a good cuddle.

6. Laugh – Laughter has so many benefits. It releases endorphins, relaxes the body, lowers stress hormones, and helps us let go of anger, anxiety, and sadness. To tickle your funny bone try watching a funny movie, TV show, or YouTube video, spend time with someone funny (even if it is via phone or FaceTime), play silly games with your kids or pets, read comics or tell jokes.

7. Limit Your Media Intake – Constant monitoring of news and social media feeds can quickly turn compulsive and counterproductive—fueling anxiety rather than easing it. The limit is different for everyone, so pay attention to how you’re feeling and adjust accordingly. If anxiety is an ongoing issue, consider limiting your media consumption to a specific time frame and time of day (e.g. thirty minutes each evening at 6 pm). Lastly, stick to trustworthy sources such as the CDC, the World Health Organization, and your local public health authorities.

8. Stay Hydrated – Drinking enough water has many health benefits. Our physical health has an impact on our mental health and vice versa. Drinking too much caffeine or sugar can make you feel jittery and increase anxiety. Therefore, replacing some of these caffeinated and sugary drinks with plain water can help you feel better.

9. Get Out In Nature, if possible. Sunshine and fresh air will do you good. Even a walk around your neighborhood can make you feel better. Just be sure to avoid crowds, keep your distance from people you encounter, and obey restrictions.

10. Spirituality – Spirituality and religion often provide a sense of security and those beliefs can be a strong coping mechanism through trying times. If your religious beliefs and affiliations provide you with a sense of peace and purpose, be sure to do things to support that like watch church services online, pray, do Bible study, etc.

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Coping Skills Bingo

Family Care, Featured, Self-Care

Download or draw your own bingo card. In each square, write a coping skill that could be used when times are stressful. Here are some examples of coping skills:

  • Listen to music
  • Talk to someone
  • Write
  • Take 10 deep breaths
  • Watch a movie
  • Use a stressball
  • Clean
  • Read
  • Say positive affirmations
  • Paint or draw
  • Laugh
  • Exercise
  • Dance
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