Tag Archive for: Youth First Social Worker

Raising Confident, Independent Kids

, ,

By Ashley Underwood, MSW, LCSW – October 22, 2025 –

Allowing your child to have independence and responsibility can be challenging. It’s difficult for some parents and guardians to acknowledge that their little ones are growing up. Just a small amount of ownership and responsibility, however, can have a big impact on your child’s development. Independence builds self-confidence, helps prepare them to complete tasks on their own in the future, and has benefits for parents as well.  

Your child’s independence will grow as they complete simple tasks. Easy tasks are best for little ones. A common example of building independence in your young child might include asking them to put their backpack and lunchbox away after they get home from school. Older children may be given the responsibility of preparing their backpack for school in the morning and hanging it up properly when they return home. While taking care of a backpack may seem like a small task, it promotes responsibility and independence.

Another way to foster independence is by allowing children to make choices. The decision can be as simple as, “Do you want to wear your Spider-Man pajamas or your Mickey Mouse pajamas to bed?” or “Would you like apples or strawberries with your sandwich?” There are countless opportunities for building independence. In the morning, let them choose their hairstyle for school or which socks they want to wear. In the evening, ask them to complete a small task such as setting the table for dinner or choosing which book they’d like to read before bed.

Making simple decisions such as this builds independence and responsibility while also developing problem-solving and decision-making skills.  

Along with completing tasks and making decisions, there are other ways you can build your child’s independence. Being consistent with a specific routine or schedule allows children to grow in this area. Consistency helps a child know what to expect each day and what will happen next. An inconsistent routine can cause confusion, create struggles, and potentially cause reactions such as a tantrum or outburst.  

Taking a step back as a parent also promotes independence in your child. Of course, parental supervision is important, and the child’s safety should always come first. It’s essential to be present while still allowing your child to explore their independence. Mistakes are inevitable, but they help both children and adults learn more about themselves, others, and the world.  

Independence should be a daily part of a child’s life. You may find that some tasks your child helps with take additional time, but they will be thrilled when they are allowed to help. Their confidence will grow with each little step they take toward independence. 

/by

Assisting Your Anxious Teen

, ,

By Angel Wagner, MSW, LCSW – October 15, 2025 –

Anxiety is a common mental health condition that many people deal with. We all experience various levels of anxiety, often characterized by worry, fear and nervousness. Symptoms can range from visible shaking, agitation, and explosiveness to complete shutdown.

Anxiety affects children and teens as well as adults. For example, for many teenagers, starting high school can be a very stressful experience. Everything is new and rushed, and students have homework, extracurricular activities, and many things to do in a short amount of time, increasing their anxiety.

If your child suffers from anxiety, below are some tips and tricks to help. 

Grounding, not Grounded

Grounding exercises are a physical or verbal interaction used to remove oneself from an anxiety-inducing moment. Grounding centers the person, allowing them to focus on the task at hand, rather than the symptoms caused by the triggering event. Think about placing horse blinders on yourself. You can ignore the chaos around you and stay focused on one thing. Grounding exercises may include counting the number of objects of a certain color in a room, rubbing circles or tapping on your hand, or counting. 

Breathe, Darling, Breathe 

Breathing exercises are also a form of physical grounding. They can help calm the body and prevent hyperventilating or holding breath. There are many breathing exercises you can try to determine which works best. A go-to is box breathing. Breathe in for a count of four, hold for four, exhale for four and finally, hold again for four. Another popular breathing method is the four – seven – eight method. Breathe in for four, hold for seven and breathe out for eight. Similar to the horse blinders analogy, the focus point is narrowed to your breathing with these exercises.

A Mama Mantra 

A mantra is a repeated sound or phrase often used in meditation. Meditation is a great relaxation technique if you’ve had an anxiety-filled day. Think of the “ohm” sound often used by monks. A mantra can be a phrase repeated by your child when they feel their anxiety rise. Repeating “It’s okay,” “Live and let live,” or “This too will pass” are a few examples. A silly favorite of mine is “Goosefaba.” Try saying that without a smile emerging. Repeating a mantra, again, shifts your focus from everything around and inside of you to a familiar catch phrase.  

Many different things can spark someone’s anxiety at any time throughout their day. For example, high school students often experience stressful situations, whether it’s new classes, tests, peer situations, life at home or romantic relationship issues.

The next time your child is struggling, have them practice one of the grounding, breathing, or counting exercises mentioned above. And don’t forget about mantras to get your child through stressful moments. With proper management, teens can reduce their anxiety symptoms and significantly improve their quality of life.  

/by

The Importance of Labeling Emotions

, ,

By Brooke Skipper, MSW, LCSW- September 8, 2025 –

One of the hardest things for a parent is to see their child struggle and not have the power to “fix” it. We all want happy, healthy children. In order to achieve that, however, we must allow kids to experience and understand a whole range of emotions.

When children learn that all emotions are acceptable and a normal part of human life, they can begin to cope with those emotions in healthy and positive ways. This helps them build empathy, resilience, and more positive self-esteem. When we talk openly with children about their emotions, we also teach them that we are a supportive, safe space, regardless of what they are experiencing.

Here are some simple ways to support your child’s emotion identification skills:

  1. Talk about emotions daily. Make it a habit to check in with your child about how they are feeling, and then really listen to what they have to say. Don’t rush to resolve or soothe their feelings. Be a safe support before you offer to help with solutions.
  2. Recognize your child’s emotions and respond with compassion. Again, it is easy to offer reassurance, but this may come off as dismissive to your child. If they tell you they are scared and you respond with, “There’s nothing to be scared of,” you are not hearing them as they express their emotions. One of the easiest ways to respond with compassion is by repeating your child’s emotion back to them. “I can see you are feeling sad. Do you want to talk about it?”
  3. Model, model, model. The best thing we can do as parents is to demonstrate healthy ways to respond to emotions. Kids learn by observing the world around them. When we continually show our children that hard emotions can be handled in positive ways, they will follow suit.
  4. Help your child develop a range of tools to use when coping with difficult emotions. There is no “one-size-fits-all” solution for emotional regulation. If deep breaths work for one person, they may not work for the next. Some skills can be used at home but not in a classroom. Brainstorm several different strategies for your child to have available.
  5. Ask your child to identify emotions in others, as well. As your child learns to recognize their own feelings, help them recognize feelings in those around them. What does a sad, happy, scared face look like? How can you tell your friend is angry? This helps build empathy and an understanding of how to support the emotions of others in a healthy way.
/by

Kids Need Boundaries

, ,

By Audrey Angermeier, MSW, LSW – September 24, 2025 –

As any parent or guardian knows, setting boundaries with children can be challenging, especially when it comes to following through. Let’s face it, it would be so much easier to give your child what they want or let them do whatever they please all the time. There would probably be fewer arguments, less eyerolling, and fewer tantrums or meltdowns, which always seem to happen at the worst possible times.

If kids are getting what they want, there shouldn’t be any pushback from them, right? Wrong! Children crave and thrive on consistency. The ironic part is that most of them don’t even know it. However, the facts clearly show that if we are not consistent in setting boundaries with children at an early age, they are more likely to struggle with self-discipline, behavior management, and healthy social interactions with peers. The likelihood of the child becoming manipulative also increases. 

Setting boundaries and sticking to them is very important for your child’s development. According to Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore, implementing age-appropriate boundaries at different developmental stages in a child’s life while maintaining a safe environment will help them develop their independence. While setting boundaries for children, it is important to remember the four C’s recommended by psychotherapist Elizabeth Beiderman ­— Communication, Clarity, Conviction, and Consistency.

Communication may seem obvious, but while relaying the set boundaries to the child, everyone involved in the child’s life must be notified of those boundaries as well.

This ties in with the fourth C, Consistency. Having consistency in every environment the child may be in will help them understand expectations and respect for others.

Clarity is crucial when explaining a child’s boundaries to them. Speaking clearly, breaking down why the child has this boundary (and what the consequences are if they break this boundary) will help them understand their set expectations.

That brings us to the remaining C, Conviction. It’s important to be kind and compassionate when setting boundaries, but it’s also essential to be firm and confident. Showing a child that you mean what you say, sticking to the boundaries you implemented, and following through on the consequences if the boundary is broken are the keys to long-lasting, effective boundaries.

Parents who do not set clear boundaries with their young children may experience parental burnout, anxiety, depression, and personal relationship problems. It’s no secret that when we feel tired or burnt out, it is harder to carry out activities in our everyday lives.

Taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally, and physically is one of the most important things you can do to help your child. You are modeling healthy behaviors and helping your child understand the importance of taking care of the whole body. When taking care of yourself, you are also more likely to react with thought and purpose when dealing with negative or positive behaviors. This means fewer arguments, eyerolling, tantrums, and meltdowns. Isn’t that the kind of family harmony we are all striving for?

/by

Gaining Mental Clarity Through a Digital Detox

, ,

By Abby Betz, MSW, LCSW – September 18, 2025 –

We live in a world where our screens never sleep. It is not very often that our minds truly get a break from the onslaught of social media and all of the information available on the World Wide Web.

From never-ending notifications to late-night scrolling, the constant digital overload is silently altering our mood and draining our focus and peace of mind. It is essential to examine the benefits of a digital detox, which can not only restore our mental clarity but also bring balance to our lives.

It is virtually impossible to escape screens in today’s overly connected world. With the popularity of phones, smartwatches, TVs, tablets, and other devices, we are constantly “plugged in” to some form of technology. Although there are many benefits of modern technology, including staying informed and connected with others, the downside of technology often leaves us feeling overstimulated and burnt out.

Too much screen time is also associated with health risks such as increased anxiety and sleep disturbances. Moreover, a study by the American Psychological Association reported that people who check their devices more than 80 times a day indicate higher rates of overall stress in their lives.

The thought of taking a break from screens may seem daunting, but there are signs to watch for that may indicate a digital detox is needed. If you find yourself scrolling through your phone first thing in the morning and last thing at night, it may be time to take a break. Constantly switching between apps or multitasking on screens may leave you feeling overwhelmed and sometimes confused.

If you feel mentally foggy, anxious, or irritable after long scrolling sessions or feel like you can’t stop checking when you try to unplug, it may be time to put the phone down. Additionally, if you have noticed a decline in the quality or duration of your sleep, you may be putting your health at risk.

Taking a complete break from screens may not seem feasible, but you don’t have to completely disappear from the tech world to reset. There are small changes or habits you can incorporate into your daily life to help create balance. A simple change may include starting your mornings without screens. Instead, use this time to stretch, walk, journal, or meditate. Establish “tech-free” zones, such as the bedroom or dinner table and ask your family to participate. Limit app notifications and set boundaries on how much information you receive. Even small breaks from the digital world have been proven to reduce cortisol levels, improve attention span, and promote feelings of inner peace.

If making small changes on your own does not seem to be working, a therapist or mental health professional can also help you understand your relationship with technology. Therapy can address feelings of dependency and screen addiction. Working with a therapist to create a personalized treatment plan can help address your struggles with screen time. The goal of therapy is to regain control of and successfully regulate your emotions. With any change in habits or behavior, starting small and setting manageable goals for yourself is key.

/by

Coping with Childhood Anxiety

, ,

By Lori Powell, MSW, LCSW – September 10, 2025 –

In today’s world, we hear a lot about anxiety. The American Psychological Association defines anxiety as “an emotion characterized by apprehension and somatic symptoms of tension in which an individual anticipates impending danger, catastrophe, or misfortune.” 

Everyone experiences anxiety to some degree, but not everyone experiences an anxiety disorder. Anxiety disorders include excessive worry, fear, and avoidance that may significantly interfere with daily life.

What does anxiety look like in children? Children may seem more irritated, uneasy, or have physical problems such as headaches or stomach aches when they are experiencing anxiety.  

Anxiety looks different for everyone. For example, when riding with a parent to school, a child with anxiety might refuse to leave the vehicle when arriving or begin hitting the parent because their fear is so extreme.  

Another student might visit the school nurse regularly, complaining of headaches or stomach problems. If the school nurse reports that there is no evidence of sickness, the student could be experiencing anxiety, especially if this situation is happening more frequently.  

Here are five helpful, positive coping skills that parents can use to help their children reduce the intensity of anxiety: deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, positive self-talk, and visualizing safe places or an animal they like.    

  1. Deep breathing is a great technique to help regulate emotions and the body. An example of a deep breathing technique is taking a deep breath through your nose, like you are smelling your favorite scent (chocolate cake or a rose), breathing out through your mouth (as if blowing out birthday candles). Just make sure that breathing is slow and deep. 
  1. Progressive muscle relaxation is another technique that can be used to help reduce anxiety. Starting with their toes, have your child tense and relax each muscle group all the way up through their head. When finished, ask your child to identify the emotion they’re feeling and recognize how their body feels. 
  1. Using the five senses can also help children reduce anxiety. An example of a technique that can be used is identifying five things you can see, touch, hear, smell, and taste.    
  1. It’s important to encourage children to talk positively about themselves. When they say things like, “I can’t do anything right” or “I’m always messing things up,” it can negatively affect their mental health. Ask them to use positive affirmations such as “I can do hard things” or “I can get through this situation.” Thinking and speaking positively helps everyone have a better attitude.
  1. Another method children can try is to think about something that makes them feel safe. For example, they can think about their pet or an animal they like, (What does the animal look like, feel like, sound like, and smell like?) or a place that makes them feel safe (What does the place look like, what does it smell like, what can you touch, and what do you hear when you are in this place?). Details are important with this activity. 

The CDC reports that 11 percent of children ages 3 to 17 had been diagnosed with anxiety, according to 2022-2023 data in the United States. If a child’s anxiety becomes more severe and episodes become more frequent, parents should contact the child’s pediatrician for an appointment or have their child evaluated by a therapist. 

/by

The Homework Struggle: How Parents and Kids Can Cope Without Conflict

, ,

by Britney Wagler, MSW, LCSW – September 3, 2025 –

As the school year settles into full swing, many households find themselves battling a familiar evening routine: the “homework struggle.” It’s a time that often brings stress, frustration, and even tears for both parent and child. With the right coping strategies, however, parents and kids can transform homework time into a more positive and productive experience.

Homework frustration stems from a mix of factors. For students, it can be a lack of understanding, fatigue after a long school day, or feeling overwhelmed by excessive work. For parents, watching their child struggle, especially when they want to help but don’t know how, can quickly lead to tension.

Every parent wants their child to succeed. When a student isn’t doing well, this can lead to frustration. It’s important to remember that frustration is a normal emotion, but how we respond to it makes all the difference to our children.

What can a parent do to minimize the frustration, stress and tears of homework?

  1. Take a step back. Resist the urge to correct or fix mistakes immediately. Let your child attempt the work on their own first. This builds independence and confidence.
  2. Stay calm and supportive. Your tone sets the mood. If your child senses your frustration, they may shut down or mirror that emotion. Take deep breaths, stay positive, and remind them and yourself that learning takes time.
  3. Break it down. Help your child break assignments into smaller, manageable tasks. This can make even the most intimidating workload feel more achievable.
  4. Create a homework routine. Consistency can reduce battles. Designate a regular time and quiet space for homework, with minimal distractions and necessary supplies ready.
  5. Know when to walk away. If things get too tense, take a short break. A ten-minute walk or a snack break can help reset everyone’s mood.

How can a parent help their child cope with frustration?

  1. Ask for help early. If something doesn’t make sense, encourage your child to ask questions before frustration builds up. It’s okay not to know everything right away.
  2. Use a timer. Working in short bursts, like 25 minutes followed by a 5-minute break, can improve focus and reduce mental fatigue. This technique, known as the Pomodoro Method, works well for all ages.
  3. Keep a positive attitude. Teach kids to replace negative self-talk (“I can’t do this”) with encouraging phrases (“I’ll try my best” or “I can ask for help”).
  4. Celebrate progress. Finishing a tough assignment deserves recognition. Whether it’s verbal praise or a small reward, celebrating effort motivates kids to keep going.

If homework struggles persist and are severe, it may be time to discuss them with the teacher. Sometimes the issue lies with unclear instructions, learning differences, or workload expectations that need adjustment.

Ultimately, homework doesn’t have to be a nightly battle. With patience, structure, and empathy, parents and kids can turn frustration into an opportunity for growth and hopefully enjoy the process of learning together.

/by

Avoiding Freshman Year Follies

, ,

By Katie Martin, MSW, LCSW – August 20, 2025 –

Freshman year is the most crucial year of high school, as it sets the tone for academic achievement and social standards. It can be a fresh start, or for some students, the beginning of ongoing struggles and painful lessons. When students start high school, their understanding of expectations is often far from accurate.

Freshman year can be intimidating, confusing, scary, overwhelming, stressful and exhausting; mentally, physically, emotionally and socially. High school becomes a rude awakening when failed classes must be repeated and discipline hinders progress toward graduation. Students may struggle with making healthy decisions that aren’t socially attractive.

It is important that students identify trusted adults, develop boundaries with peers, prioritize academics and attendance, strive for high grades, join extracurriculars, and incorporate healthy habits. Students who surround themselves with people who promote good habits and motivate them to take ownership of their high school career will experience more success and less stress. 

The goal of high school is to prepare students for graduation and life. Freshmen can take ownership of their success by taking control of the things they have control over, letting go of the things they cannot control, and distancing themselves from unhealthy relationships. Setting goals as a freshman and speaking up about concerns and feelings can greatly improve a student’s chance of success. 

Social adjustments are expected; students may have to redefine what is cool. Freshmen are trying to figure out who they are and where they belong. Having the courage to set boundaries with peers doesn’t come easily to most students. Students should build relationships with those who promote healthy habits that propel them toward graduation, such as trusted adults and positive peers. 

Understanding the connection between academic success and maximizing opportunities for the future is imperative. Typically, a GPA (Grade Point Average) is generated by averaging the points earned from each letter grade at the end of a grading period and/or semester; an F can result in a course being repeated if it is part of the graduation plan established with the student’s academic counselor. On average, most colleges require a GPA between 2.5 and 3.0, but this can vary. Freshmen should know their high school academic counselor, establish solid communication, and work closely with them to stay alert to academic opportunities and progress toward a successful post-graduation plan.

Parents play a major role in student success by modeling helpful qualities such as organization, problem-solving, assertiveness and navigating opportunities that promote growth. Parents should connect with school personnel to establish communication and create a network of trusted adults to collaborate with during the student’s high school years. Parents also need access to grades and attendance. They should check in with their student daily about successes and struggles.

Parents should also connect with school staff as needed but also direct their student to reach out to teachers to encourage independence, build appropriate and effective problem-solving and communication skills, and encourage positive relationships. Parents should attend all available parent nights, orientations, and any other opportunities to be present with their child in the school building. 

Freshman year can make or break a high school career. According to the US Department of Education, students fail ninth grade more than any other grade in high school. This can lead to feelings of frustration and discouragement that can result in less effort, lower motivation and the possibility of dropping out. Freshman year is hard; it requires more attention, organization, maturity and independence. Freshman year also requires students to make more thoughtful decisions rather than decisions based upon impulse or popularity. 

In conclusion, students are capable of graduating and can learn all the necessary tools to get there. However, work begins on the first day of high school, when every student will decide what they are going to do with their opportunity to learn. Supportive adults and a growth mindset will carry a student far. However, high school should also be fun, exciting and full of new experiences that can be enjoyed more fully when academics are well-managed.     

/by

Be the Superhero Your Child Needs: The Power of Presence, Love and Example

, ,

By Nolan Miller, MSW, LCSW – August 14, 2025 –

We often think of superheroes as those who wear capes, possess powers, and save the world with flashy rescues. But in reality, some of the most important superheroes don’t fly; they stand beside a child, quietly shaping their future through love, support, and example.

Every child faces challenges. Whether it’s school struggles, peer pressure, big emotions, or feeling misunderstood, the world can be overwhelming. But when a child knows there’s someone who sees them, believes in them, and stays by their side, they begin to build the strength to rise above life’s storms. That “someone” can be you.

The Everyday Hero Work
You don’t need a mask or magic. You just need to show up. Listening without judgment, offering a hug when words fall short, and making time for even the smallest moments—those are your superpowers. The bedtime stories, the car rides, the walks around the block, the simple “I’m proud of you,” they all add up to something much bigger than we realize.

Children may not always remember exactly what we say, but they’ll never forget how we made them feel. Your presence tells them they matter. Your encouragement tells them they can try again. Your boundaries teach them safety. And your love, especially your unconditional love, teaches them how to value themselves.

The Struggles Are Real—and So Is Your Impact
When kids struggle, they need a safe harbor. Life comes at them fast—friendship drama, academic pressure, big questions about identity, anxiety about the future. And while we can’t shield them from every storm, we can anchor them. Your steady voice and open arms remind them that they’re never alone.

Being their superhero doesn’t mean fixing everything; it means walking beside them through it. Sometimes, just sitting in silence, holding their hand, or saying, “I don’t have all the answers, but I’m here,” is enough to help them breathe again.

The Legacy You’re Building
What you do today matters far more than you know. By showing compassion, staying consistent, and being honest about your struggles and growth, you model what resilience looks like. You show your child how to get back up. You teach them empathy, courage, and character.

And one day, when they’re older and faced with a world full of decisions and distractions, they’ll remember the strength you gave them. They’ll stand taller, walk kinder, and love stronger, because a real-life superhero raised them.

Final Word: The Hero They’ll Always Remember
In the end, it’s not about perfection. It’s about showing up again and again, even when you’re tired, even when you’re unsure, even when you feel like you’re not enough.

Because to your child, you are. You always have been, and you always will be. So keep going. Keep loving. Keep being the difference.

The world may never see your cape, but your child will never forget your impact.

/by