By Vicki Kirkman, Courier & Press, Oct. 13, 2015 – After a recent hockey game, I overhead my 4-year old son ask, “Did you win, Daddy? Did you beat the other team?” He was jumping up and down with excitement to hear the good news about a victory.

His happy face turned sad when he realized his dad’s team had lost.  My husband saw his disappointment and shared that despite the loss, he did his best and still had a great time playing.

Learning to lose gracefully and be a fair sport can be hard for anyone.  One of the greatest lessons parents can teach their children is to enjoy the experience of sports instead of focusing on the outcome.  Winning a championship game or being ranked number one is great, but learning how to handle disappointment or seeing someone else win is valuable too.

Parents can help their children learn good sports etiquette in several ways.  Encouraging them to try their hardest and focus on aspects of the game like meeting new friends can take the pressure off of winning. Helping children set personal goals allows them to improve their individual growth.

Parents should also stress the importance of cooperating with others, listening to their coach and maintaining a positive attitude. The easiest way parents can teach their kids how to play fair and be a good sport is to model good sportsmanship behavior themselves.

The website www.kidshealth.org provides other helpful tips for children and young adults to remember.  Those 10 tips include:

1. Be polite to everyone you’re playing with and against. Keep language polite and don’t “trash talk.”
2. Don’t show off, just play your best. If you’re good, people will notice anyway!
3. Tell your opponents “good game” whether you have won or lost.
4. Learn the rules of the game and show up for practices and games on time.
5. Listen to your coaches and follow their directions about playing.
6. Don’t argue with an official if you don’t agree with his or her call. If you don’t understand a certain call, wait until the end of the game and ask your coach to explain it to you.
7. Don’t make up excuses or blame a teammate when you lose. Take responsibility for your own performance and try to learn from what happened.
8. Be willing to sit out so another team member can get in the game, even if you think you are a better player.
9. Play fair and don’t cheat.
10. Cheer for yourself and teammates. Keep a positive attitude!

There are many benefits to playing sports.  Participating in sports is an excellent way to get physical exercise.  It can help children burn off extra energy, manage stress, lower depression and maintain a healthy weight.  Being involved in athletics teaches teamwork and responsibility. It also allows children to meet other kids with similar interests.  Lastly, children that participate in sports often have a positive body image and gain confidence in their abilities, which leads to higher self-esteem.

Teaching kids the importance of being a graceful winner and loser is a necessary part of the game.  When good sportsmanship is practiced everyone wins!

This column is contributed by Vicki Kirkman, school social worker for Youth First, Inc., a local nonprofit dedicated to strengthening youth and families. To learn more about Youth First, visit www.youthfirstinc.org or call 812-421-8336.

By Ahmad Allaw, Courier & Press, Sept. 29, 2015 –

You walk into what seems like an auditorium with a flood of seats to your front, back, right and left. Eventually, you take a seat among a sea of others. There are perhaps 200 students, maybe more.

It’s nothing like you have ever seen. It is neither like high school nor what came before. Some students will quickly become accustomed to these large lecture courses, succeeding without fail. Others, though, will feel like a drop of water among what seems to be an endless stretch of ocean.

The professor speaks and leaves. There is no time to ask questions. If you stumble, the teacher is not there to pick you up. If you fall behind, the run does not stop; instead, the marathon continues. One bad grade can quickly become two, and two can quickly become even more.

In college, many will experience their first real academic struggles, and the struggle hurts. It hurts because you aren’t necessarily lacking in effort. It hurts because you see others, with less time invested, succeeding when you are not.

You may not know what to do. You may feel defeated and think about giving up. You may question yourself, doubting your own value and intellect.

For college students who experience such issues, the biggest mistake is thinking you are alone and believing you cannot or should not ask for help.

Perhaps all I have written thus far falls on deaf ears. However, if there is one thing I could say, one piece of invaluable advice I cannot stress more, it would be to never shy away from asking for help.

The help is there. For any troubles you could almost certainly talk to your resident adviser or counselor. Every university also has tutoring services. The professors that leave immediately after lecture have office hours. Most are friendlier than they might seem during lecture, and they also want to see you succeed. If the professor is not there, a teacher’s assistant almost certainly will be there.

Remember, help is always there, but you must have the courage to use it.

And, as a reminder, always have perspective. You may tend to get caught up in your present, forgetting both what came before and what may still be to come. You are in college because of your own accomplishments. You are in college because someone saw what you had done, what you were and what you could be. Someone was willing to take a chance on you.

So never feel like you don’t belong that college isn’t for you or that you are somehow less worthy than anyone else. And remember, you are more — much more — than your grades. Don’t let your grade-point average define who you are.

And so, as a college student, things won’t necessarily be easy. You will likely struggle at times, whether in academia or otherwise. But, if you seek out help, if you use the resources the university provides, you will have a much easier time than if you keep things to yourself.

By Margery Gianopoulos, Courier & Press, Sept. 22, 2015 –

In 1996, the state of California became the first in the U.S. to legalize medical marijuana. Since then, 22 other states have joined California, including Michigan and Illinois. Ohio is considering several marijuana-related initiatives for voters next fall, and if any of them pass, Indiana would be surrounded on three sides by states with some form of legal marijuana use.

The legalization of marijuana is changing the landscape across the country. While surveys indicate that substance use among youths has dropped, the data also shows that more youths perceive marijuana to be less risky than in years past. In other words, a growing number of teens think the occasional use of marijuana is no big deal, and it won’t hurt them. Prevention researchers say as the perception of risk drops, substance use typically increases.

Indiana University’s School of Public Health measures risk factors through the annual Indiana Youth Survey. Most states have this same type of survey. The Indiana Youth Survey measures 30-day substance use, age of first use, perception of peer approval and parental approval, along with risk factors which may increase problem youth behaviors such as substance use, school dropout, violence, pregnancy and behavior health.

The behaviors and attitudes of Warrick County’s sixth- through 12th-grade students mirror the national data. From 2013 to 2014, the number of sixth -raders reporting low perception of risk for marijuana more than tripled.

Clearly, the legalization of marijuana is impacting thinking, and it could soon impact behavior among our youths.

The questions surrounding the issue include: Is medical marijuana a good thing, what research is being done, and what about recreational use? Can pot be addictive? What could be the impact on our children and communities, and how do we separate the truth from the myths?

Warrick County Communities That Care Coalition and Youth First, Inc. held a town hall to a discuss these questions and more during a town hall forum on Sept. 8th.

Former WIKY News Director Randy Wheeler moderated the discussion with a panel that included Dr. Daniel Rusyniak, medical director of the Indiana Poison Center and professor of emergency medicine, Indiana University School of Medicine; Marlin Weisheit, Warrick County commissioner and retired Chandler police chief; Judge Keith Meier, Warrick County Superior Court and Drug Court, retired; Brett Kruse, Warrick County sheriff; Michael Perry, Warrick County prosecutor; Tad Powless, director of special education, Warrick County School Corp.; Davi Stein-Kiley, Youth First director of social work; Kathy Baker, Youth First school social worker, Castle High School; Althea Ingram, Castle High School parent; Kaylynne Glass, Castle High School junior; Alex Hardgrave, Castle High School sophomore.

By Ahmad Allaw, College Student Volunteer, Courier & Press, August 25, 2015 –

Not too long ago, I was sitting in the backseat of the family car, my heart beating excitedly, waiting to reach what I hoped would become my home away from home: college. The experience is, quite literally, a momentous occasion. At roughly 18 years old, we, as incoming college students, begin to write our own stories and chart our own paths.

The first few days are as exciting and enriching as expected. We meet new people and explore new places, dine with friends and hear new stories. The independence is both refreshing and empowering.

However, as days turn into weeks and weeks turn into months, the initial excitement wanes and the independence becomes a bit daunting. Soon enough, you may find yourself longing for home.

Getting homesick, of course, is to be expected. After all, moving from one place to another, leaving most of your family and friends, and living on your own is no small change.

However, you — the incoming freshman — don’t want that change to turn into anxiety, and for your anxiety to affect your mental or physical health.

After going through the transition myself, I recommend keeping the following in mind to ease any troubles.

It’s important to realize that, although you may be moving hundreds of miles from family, friends, and home, you aren’t severing any ties. Starting a new chapter of your life doesn’t mean you have to forget all the ones previous.

On the contrary, realize that your present doesn’t exist without your past; you reached the place you reached in large part because of the support of family and friends. Just because you aren’t physically with them doesn’t mean they won’t continue helping when you need help.

Moreover, it’s important to remember that you are likely not the only one who will feel homesick. It is a normal feeling. Almost all of the other incoming freshmen will be in the same position.

Finally, you will have the opportunity to meet incredible people in college, and there will be no shortage of those who share the same interests as you. The easiest way to find such people is through extracurricular clubs and involvement.

Spend time looking at the clubs offered at your school, and you would be hard-pressed not to find something that suits your interests. Soon enough, you will find yourself doing the things you love with people whose company you will enjoy, a second family to ease any burden of longing or homesickness. My closest friends now are the same people that I spent so much time working and collaborating with during the club activities.

For me personally, these small strategies proved invaluable. After the first few weeks of college passed and things became a bit more difficult, I found myself calling my family weekly, talking to them even if just for a little bit. Getting added support, feeling as though someone else is invested in your success, makes you feel more comfortable under academic stress in new surroundings.

And if you find yourself needing support beyond what family and friends can provide, most college campuses have counseling centers experienced in helping students deal with feelings of isolation and homesickness. Seek extra help and support if these feelings start to interfere with your ability to cope with the demands of college life.

 

By Brooke Skipper, Courier & Press, August 18, 2015 –

It’s August once again, and that means back to school time. Early mornings, structured days, increased activities and mounting homework become your household’s reality.

No matter how many years your child has been in school, transitioning back into the classroom setting can always feel a little chaotic. Minimizing this stress is essential for your entire family’s health and happiness.

Here are some simple yet effective tips to help ease those back-to-school blues.

Be sure your child is in good physical and mental health by scheduling appointments with your family doctor and dentist. Discuss any concerns you have over your child’s emotional development with your pediatrician. Your doctor can help determine if your concerns are age-appropriate issues or require further assessment. Your child will benefit if you can identify and begin addressing a potential issue as soon as it arises.

Establish bedtime and mealtime routines. Routines help reinforce your child’s overall good health. Eating a meal together as a family provides time to reflect on the school day and gauge how your child is coping. If your summer has been largely unstructured, prepare your child for this change by talking about why routines are important.

Familiarize yourself with your child’s teachers as well as other school professionals in the building who can be a resource. This can include the principal and front office personnel; school social worker, psychologist and counselor; the reading specialist, speech therapist and school nurse and coaches and activity coordinators. Youth First Social Workers are available as a resource in over 50 schools in six Southwestern Indiana counties and implement a variety of evidenced- based programs and practices to assist you and your child.

Let your child know you care wholeheartedly and unconditionally. Pay attention to your child’s mood and behavior as school resumes. Make sure to ask open-ended questions about the school day to ensure real communication beyond a “yes” or “no” answer. Praise your child’s effort each day, not the result.

Model positive behavior in your home to increase your child’s healthy coping skills. If there is anxiety about school, reinforce the ability to cope by remaining optimistic and confident in your child. Give your child a few healthy strategies to manage a difficult situation such as talking with someone or journaling.

Remain calm and positive about a new start. Children who have had a difficult time academically or socially or were teased or bullied may be more fearful or reluctant to return to school. Talk about the issues and how things can improve this year. If you have not yet done so, share your child’s concern with the school and confirm that the problem has been addressed. Reassure your child that you and the school are working together to prevent further issues.

Using these strategies in your home can assist your child in feeling more prepared and secure during the return to school. A strong home foundation helps to promote a strong educational foundation. You can directly influence the amount of success your child has at school by promoting a positive attitude, confidence and performance both socially and academically.